Quotes from a July spent in Clarion

Week 1

 (insightful analysis) …I want to lick your brain.
~Wonders.

Parenthetically, if I told my friends I wasn’t the first to write a story with twenty four foxes in it, they’d never believe me.
~Tim

I am so slack~jawed with wonder an entire grizzly bear could just climb in there.
~Worrad

"My hovercraft is full of eels!"
~Worrad

"I gave it nine fucks out of ten, pretty much."
~Bolander

"Get these motherfucking faeries off this motherfucking plane."
~Annie

Onwards into the madness! (Beware of swearing, sorry. There's a lot.)

Oh dear, it’s December already?

I think at this point it would be better to introduce these quotes with no explanation. Because I can’t explain them. 😀


October
PCB: You bring joy and light and locusts and disease to my life, have I ever told you?

Bahnree: i love it when you shout "zombie lovers" in all caps

Bahnree: oh my gosh my brain, today, is just pre-emptively jumping into the gutter
Bahnree: regardless of what I’m saying
Bahnree: and then i’m like, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THE GUTTER? HOW ARE YOU MAKING THAT DIRTY?"
Bahnree: and my brain just whimpers and rolls in manure-juice
Bahnree: *feels unwell*

Bahnree: music video guys are like abstract art: mesmerizing and bearing no relation to real life

Snazel: I hear you were abusing my sister with your untruths
PCB: oh DON’T PLAY WITH THAT
PCB: that’s my BRAIN
PCB: you CAN’T HAVE IT

PCB: constant mindrape makes my stem sore

PCB: I only lie to you, y’know
PCB: I’m terribly mean to little girls
PCB: and I have moodswings with Kemendraugh
PCB: but I only lie to you
Snazel: Awww

PCB: there’s no need to be mean
Snazel: there isn’t?
Snazel: I’m sorry
Snazel: *is sorry*
Snazel: *cries on your neck in remorse*
PCB: man
PCB: y’know who is just obscenely weird?
PCB: McKernan
Snazel: Which one?
Snazel: what’s he doing now?
PCB: the male one
PCB: nothing, just
PCB: he’s so weird
Snazel: I met him in bed
Snazel: shirtless
Snazel: drinking a beer
PCB: whuuuuuuuh k
Snazel: it would have been more memorable if it wasn’t 2am at the time
PCB: he doesn’t, come across as incredibly weird in person
PCB: but
PCB: he is
PCB: his fb declares it
Snazel: the one about corn?
PCB: ALL OF IT
PCB: the raps about Aquinas and crack
PCB: the weirdass profile pictures
PCB: the mindf*** fb notes
Snazel:
Snazel: you want to grow up to be him, don’t you
PCB: oh, and all the techno links
PCB: NOOOOOO
PCB: that is a kind of weird… gleh
Snazel: 😀
PCB: that kind of weird is almost too much for me
Snazel: so you want to MARRY him
Snazel: that’s okay
Snazel: it’s legal!
Snazel: and you can mindf*** JP
PCB: do you hate me?
PCB: do you hate me with a burning passion that rivals that of a thousand suns inside a thousand hells inside a thousand cafeteria microwaves?
PCB: because that’s what your last four sentences would seem to indicate
PCB: I can’t imagine why else you would want to put me through such mental anguish as I am trying not to experience right now

Snazel: this stupid cursed story
PCB: yo dawg
PCB: we herd you like stories
PCB: SO WE MADE YOU WRITE A SHORT STORY BEFORE NANOWRIMO STARTS LIKE A f***ING ASSWIPE
Snazel: so we gave you a cursed story so you can curse while you story
PCB: so we put some stories in your stories so you can curse while you curse

November:
Snazel: I bought you a present
Snazel: you like pink, right?
PCB: I LUUUUUUURVE pink
PCB: is it a girl?
PCB: omygawsh
PCB: did you get me a GIRL?
PCB: did you get me TWO girls

PCB: yo dawg
PCB:we herd you like innuendo
PCB: so we put a double-entendre in your double-entendre
PCB: so you can think dirty while u think dirty
PCB: if u know what I mean.

Bahnree:Burlesque has Cam Gigandet as a hot bartender
Bahnree: which, sadly, makes me want to see it
Snazel: You’re sold
Bahnree: LOL
Snazel: hahahahahahahahahaha
Bahnree: I’m just throwing this out there
Bahnree: XD
Snazel: hehehehehehhe
Snazel: well, I want to OH IT"S MIDNIGHT
Bahnree: i just hurt my throat
Snazel: I guess we’ll never know what I want
Snazel: How did you hurt your throat?
Snazel:tell me everything
Bahnree: "I want to" is best interrupted by observing that it’s LATE AT NIGHT
Bahnree: from laughing
Snazel: hehehehhehehehhehehhe
Bahnree: hehehehehe
Snazel: hehehh

Neldor: yeah…
Neldorh: anyways back I go to writing
Snazel: God Bless
Neldor: sigh
Snazel: oh fb, why you give me cute boys singing fun songs
Snazel: which are immoral
Snazel: and gay
Snazel: sigh
Neldor: ….go back to writing Snazel

Bahnree: did you get my email about visiting me? (I don’t live in a brothel btw)

Bahnree: LOL I LOVE YOUR BEFORE PICTURE
Bahnree: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Snazel: 😀
Snazel: I swear we were trying to get a good picture
Snazel: it was just REALLY HARD
Bahnree: Great photos
Bahnree: yeah, you just look so, "Ok. I am getting my hair cut. Ok. I am being photographed. Let us move on."
Bahnree: like
Bahnree: apathetic
Bahnree: the essence of apathy
Bahnree: that’s what i would call that photo
Bahnree: plus you’re so cute ^___^

Bahnree: ‬ ‪dude so true‬
Bahnree: no one believes in fridays

‪Bahnree: ‬ ‪you go girl‬
Bahnree: do you ever randomly switch
Bahnree: from 3rd person to 1st, without even noticing until a page later? O.o
Snazel: ‬ ‪no‬
Snazel: I go from 3rd to 2nd
Snazel: and then to 1st
Snazel: and then basically into all caps rant
Bahnree: ‬ ‪LOL‬
Snazel: ‬ ‪and then back into 3rd‬
‪Bahnree: ‬ ‪you are so amazing!‬
Snazel: ‬ ‪and then I eat chocolate‬
Bahnree: ‬ ‪:DDDDDDDD‬
Snazel: ‬ ‪it’s a living’‬
Bahnree: ‬ ‪wow, i need chocolate‬

Snazel: now the river is a character
Snazel: with the personalisty of a fruit fly on acid
kemendraugh: an excellent way to boost words!
Snazel: MORE CARRIE UNDERWOOD

Rosemary Elizabeth: Just woke up from a dream with too many huge frogs. Gotta watch less planet earth.
James Arsenault: obviously you need to watch MORE planet earth

Snazel: *Prince James is now Catholic*
Zack C: the f***?*
Snazel: 😀
Snazel: *blames you*
Zack C: which number was he?
Snazel: the fifth
Zack C: ah
Snazel: wait, what?
Zack C: little chance of him ascending then, anyway
Zack C: you can’t be the monarch if you’re Catholic, no?
Snazel: this is the FUTURE
Zack C: uh whuh
Snazel: he’s dating a girl from india, who’s baptist
Snazel: James in my BOOK
Snazel: hahahahahahahahahah
Zack C: I don’t underst- ohhhh
Snazel: HAHAHAHAHAHA

PCB: also
PCB: one of the required texts for my lit course is "The Vagina Monologues"
PCB: I think
PCB: I’m switching

Snazel: I fear for my sanity
Kemendraugh: don’t fear for what’s already gone!

Bahnree: i hate purple bars
Bahnree: *glares at them*
Snazel: you know what is hard
Bahnree: lol
Bahnree: what?
Snazel: spwlling
Snazel: SO HARD
Snazel: also, yes spurpalb bars are loose
Bahnree: i am so saving this conversation
Bahnree: and showing it to you later
Snazel: okay